Down Home Out & About

I choked. I did, Sonny even confirmed it for me the other night. I think about it when I drive home after work and at odd times during the day. They'll probably edit me out. Just need to get this off my chest. I didn't say what I wanted to say. I wanted to say exactly this:
"Human nature will eventually put it's foot down & let jealousy into the relationship(s) and from there it will end up (more often than not) causing the whole thing to crumble."

INSTEAD I said:

"I wasn't that shocked (that Sonny loosely had that type of relationship before)(loosely is the operative word here)I guess I was more shocked that the girls put up with the situation."

I feel lame, but I hope I'll eventually get over it. Even though it haunts me when I'm alone, because now I know exactly what I WOULD have said had I not felt rushed.

Sonny on the other hand will NOT be edited out. I choked.

Oh well. It's not the end of the world ( it is ) but hardly because of the Tyra Banks Show.

Onward and upward....

Summer has come and gone practically and I feel like it was only here for a few weeks. The weather is already Spring / Fall like again. It's gorgeous.

I love it because it's crisp. I was just in North Carolina and it was so muggy. The rainy days here aren't stifling, they're cleansing.



These pics are what Sophia calls "baby flowers"...we planted a bunch of morning glories in the yard and we check them everyday:


There's just so much good stuff....

Tyra Tyra Tyra

Tyra Banks, here we come!

Yes, she's having a show about polyamory. And they've contacted us because of my "Love & Marriage" group on myspace. Don't laugh.

The topic of the show is Polyamory, and those that are in polyamorous relationships. I have a feeling that we're to be the "good couple" or couple that this type of thing DOESN'T work for. The associate producer sent me a message yesterday looking for a monogamus couple & will be interviewing Sonny & I today over the phone.

Lovely. This is going to be fun. Because whatever we've done - we do have these principles, an open marriage is something that can only fall apart over time. Human nature / in a true open relationship takes hold eventually and the emotions that are only natural like jealousy begin to corrode it. And I think about this subject in a philosophical way. To each his own - definitely. It's hard to be monogamus if you aren't with the right person. On the other hand, to be able to handle this type of relationship, you must have a smaller or broader (depends on how you look at it) emotional range. We've all been through our rough times, and truthfully, I have found that ultimate faithfulness is practically unachievable if you aren't in the relationship you were meant to be in. But mighty easy if you are. Why would you ever want to put something that you work so hard on in jeapardy. Why, if you make that promise & the road stretches out long and clear ahead of you, would you want to taint it with something that in the long run isn't for you and won't make you happy. The only way to really get what is right for yourself is to deal with it in an honest way. If someone I was with had eyes for another, and actually asked me if they could be with someone else. I'd say, honey.. thank you for letting me know before you actually acted on those emotions. Now, go.

Just like with Jim. In retrospect, I realized that the only way that you can actually get what you want, is to do it rightly. If you want a married man... the only way to get him is to NOT GIVE IT UP. Either it will happen or it won't, but the only way to know for sure is if you hold steadfast & not break the rules karmically.

Anyhow, we went on Monday night to Los Angeles and flew back yesterday. The show was primarily about those "other" types of couples. Sonny and I were in the second row and Tyra directed one question at each of us. Sonny got applause :) It was quite a lot to pay on their part for just two questions. I feel that she could have delved into our side of the coin a bit more, we had a good lot to say in the matter... but she had too many polyamory guests to get through. Though beautiful, I would have to say..... hmmm.... Vapid? (forgive me Tyra)

It was an all expense paid trip, complete with limo's and a stay at the Hyatt on the Sunset strip. They even paid me to be out of work for the day :) Something (knock on wood) is working in our favor for this to have happened. As we've been pretty broke.

All in all, I'm excited to have had this experience... Now we just need our own show!

S.